love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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