I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
She's like a pop up book from hell.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
