In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
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