i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize