I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
