There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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