How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Never joke about your clitoris.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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