i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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