I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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