I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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