Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
