if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Randomize
