In the future we'll all be gay
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
