im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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