Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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