he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"