i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
