just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
