No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
My vagina just clenched in fear
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