Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
