this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
