Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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