We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Are we still banned from the library?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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