just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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