so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
