Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize