his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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