i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize