Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
