im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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