I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
