I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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