my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
