how can u be prego again
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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