when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Are my feet made of real feet?
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Randomize
