I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
