I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
