I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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