what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize