I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Randomize
