i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
