then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
vagina is talking i cant
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
