Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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