Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
