please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
