Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
