I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
thus making me awesome and them whores
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize