do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize
