too bad you live with your parents still
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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