How'd it feel making her break her religion?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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